How’s my favorite audience of blog readers doing? Summer is coming, people, and that means you’re probably going to have relatives and out of town friends coming to visit. Unless, of course, you live somewhere terrible like Wisconsin (if any of you live in Wisconsin, sorry, but let’s be honest). And if there’s one thing I know about out of town visitors, it’s that those jerks always depend on you to entertain them 24 hours a day. Well if you have absolutely no idea what to do for your boring friends and relatives, then you’re who we have in mind when we do this list. It’ll let you know what’s popular, which is all that really matters.
Paul McCartney
Paul McCartney is bringing his Out There! tour back to the United States, for the third time since it began in May of 2013. Because he’s smart and knows that Americans will continue to spend money they don’t have to watch their least favorite Beatle perform the songs they love. The third North American leg of McCartney’s world tour begins June 14th, and has dates running until mid-August.
photo credit: pitch.com
Justin Timberlake
JT’s 20/20 Experience World Tour is currently overseas in Europe. Fans on that side of the world will be enjoying him for the next couple months as he performs shows in the Middle East, Africa, and even more Europe, before finally coming home in July.
photo credit: popsugar.com
Fleetwood Mac
If you’re a Fleetwood Mac fan and you haven’t heard the “wonderful” news that Christine McVie (I think that’s her name) is joining the band again after 15 years and going on tour, then you’re an idiot. Stupid.
photo credit: pulpcultureblog.dallasnews.com
Luke Bryan
It’s Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve! That’s what I have to tell myself every time I see a picture of Luke Bryan. He’s got that “boy next door” charm, but he’s also not afraid to wear his hat backwards. In your face traditional family values! But he is a country musician, which means I secretly want him to die. JK I’m very vocal about my death wishes for all country musicians. For those of you who are still reading this, Bryan’s That’s My Kind of Night tour is currently on it’s second North American leg. “Hey Diego, if this is the second North American leg, that means Luke Bryan probably just returned from Europe or something right?” Guess again, idiot! He’s got two legs for this tour: North American leg 1, North American Leg 2. Suck it Europe! ‘Murica!
photo credit: billboard.com
Aerosmith & Slash
Steve Tyler and Curls McTophat (aka Slash) felt left out from all the old rock bands that are reuniting and teaming up with other old rock bands to go on tour (e.g. Def Leppard & Kiss; Mötley Crüe & Alice Cooper; Cher?), so they decided to join old forces and go on a tour of their own. The Let Rock Rule tour is set to kick off mid-summer and has dates set until September. Stay tuned for more dates to be added, possibly a European or Asian leg. Because rock shouldn’t only be allowed to rule in North America, it belongs to all the people of Earth, and Aerosmith and Slash are its badass ambassadors….it’s ambadassadors?
photo credit: radio.com
The Book of Mormon
I feel like The Book of Mormon has been on this list longer than this list has existed. Every week with this one. Go watch something else, America! If this is your first time to this blog, I guess I can tell you what this one’s about. The rest of you can probably just skip it at this point. The Book of Mormon is a musical satire from the creators of South Park, Trey Parker and Matt Stone. It features an original story and Tony award-winning music about a group of Mormon evangelists that take their message of American Jesus (the best Jesus there is!) to Africa. If you’re actually Mormon, you’ll probably hate it. However, if you’re Mormon and you’re trying to get kicked out of your church, invite your friends and family to a showing of The Book of Mormon. You’ll be out in no time.
photo credit: stageandcinema.com
Wicked
Here’s another one that’s been popular since I was like 11. Wicked is the story of the witches of Oz–as in, The Wizard of. The story takes place before and after Dorothy’s terrorist rampage through the land (I only read the book once and it was a long time ago), and focuses mostly on the two that are in the picture below. The East and West witches? I’m a single man, so I don’t really know details about Wicked.
photo credit: broadway.org
The Lion King
Who doesn’t love the Lion King? Terrorists, that’s who!
photo credit: last.fm
A Raisin in the Sun
Hey! It’s been a while since we’ve had this one on the list. It’s the story of a poor, black family struggling against prejudice, family tensions, and identity during the first half of the 20th century. My favorite part about it: it’s not a musical. Oh, and the current Broadway run stars Denzel freaking Washington!
photo credit: washingtonpost.com
Disney on Ice: Let’s Celebrate!; 100 Years of Magic
Who’s your favorite Disney character? Ever wonder what it would be like to see them ice skate? No? Well no one cares about what you want, Disney’s got money to make!
photo credit: queenbeetickets.com
